Saturday, October 1, 2016

my blood..

feel my blood girl,

feel it fall,

as you touch my dying heart,

Taste the taste of death itself,

And be my help,

do what no doctor has ever done,

what no physician or psychologist can,

Give me love,

and take the pain with me,

Be my deadly baby,

the one that tears me apart.

Tuesday, September 20, 2016

My lil princess

My lil princess does not know what she does to me,

Every time she gets on her tired feet and runs,

It just stuns me every time.

The strengh she has,

That motivation and willpower,

So innocent and sweet,

just draws me in,

like i'm in deep  water,

But everything is ok,

When I am holding her.


Saturday, September 17, 2016

stip the bleeding.

Lord help me stop the bleeding...

I can't stand myself anymore!

You understand but I don't,

Just help me not self destruct,

help me Jesus Help!

You know my pain....

And you saved me.

So help me stay afloat.

Please Jesus, help!

hope....

There is hope,

I look to heaven,

And it leaves me wanting,

Just wanting to go home,

He's saved me thrice,

So Jesus has me here for a reason,

I just don't know why,

I still just want to cry.

Lord, take me home.

Friday, September 16, 2016

touch my scars...

Will you dare touch my scars,

Kiss my hurting lips,

And love me as I bleed,

Hug me as I die,

And hold me as I fall apart,

So girl choose me,

And see the scene ,

of a dying boy that nobody sees,

The one that looks so joyful,

But is in reality coming undone....

When I think Of You.

When I think of you,

Every time I do,

I see your pretty smile,

And feel your tears you cry,

When I see you,

I see dreams come true,

As you walk up to me ,

Dressed with Cinderella's beauty,

When I feel you,

I feel the pain,

Knowing you must leave today.

Thursday, September 15, 2016

History's thoughts: The similarity between the Confederate Flag and the American Flag and both nations ( Before the Confederacy fell.)

Well, I've been thinking today how I have a Confederate Flag quilt on my bed and a American flag hanging on my wall right on top of my bed. It got me thinking: is there any similarities  between the Confederate Flag , The American Flag, and their history? Here's what I cme up with after much thinking. First of all, the Confederate flag and American Flag represent freedom. As crazy as it sounds, it is true. The South wanted freedom from the North because they thought the North was being unfair to the South, and the original colonies that made up the  original America also faught for indpenfance, but they were wanting Independence from British rule. Both nations gained their indpendence, the Confederacy and the United States of America. Yes, the Confederacy only lasted for a few years but it gained Independence even though not for long. We all know it fell after the Civil War. Both the American Flag and Confederate Flag the men that faught under each , they were all patriots. And to be honest, I think eventually  there will be a American Civil War II in the future. I don't konw if it will be in my life time or not. but there just might be one. This time however, it will NOT have slavery involved as a issue. If it happens, all races and minorities who are willing to fight to defend their freedom will be welcomed to join. Our government is becoming more and more corrupt and that corruptness is what might lead to a Civil War II. God bless America and may America not become so corrupt that it is dangerous everywhere.

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

What does it mean to " Be a man"? ( Part One)

I love country music y'all as noted. There's a fairly new song from country-pop singer Kelsea Ballerini called Peter Pan. It's about a guy who's "never gonna grow up , never gonna be a man."
What does it mean to " be a man?"

Well, in the Bible  Paul says to us Christian guys and gals in 1st Corinthians 13:11 that " When i was a child, I talked like a child, Thought like a child, and reasoned like a child. When I was a man I put away childish things." Now I shall try to go into that now. Well, first of all I will start by saying that the ways us guys treat women can be childish and how with God's help change that. Admit it, most guys sometimes see a girl and have sexual thoughts. It's even harder in relationships. More often than not we end up " breaking up." with the girl. If you just act thoughtlessly with her and start sleeping with her, especally if it is a biblical relationship between 2 Christians, you make it unbiblical and you have defiled the gir'ls body and sinned against God. You could possibly make her pregnant and that could lead to her aborting the child which is murder. If you get into that state here are the 2 things you should do: Not dump her and the baby, but support her. However do not screw up with her again unless you get married to her and after that you can screw up with her and truly love her. Remember our bodies are God's temple. ( 1st Corinthians 6:19-20). overall this first part of this article is don't follow youthful passions over girls. ( 2nd Timothy 2:22 ) and don't date non Christian girls also.

To be continued....

Sunday, August 21, 2016

Don't hate me..

Don't hate me,

For what I am,

I never chose to be this way,

So stop the hate,

Don't give me pain.

Don't hurt me,

I know you don't want me,

You use me like a toy,

And seduce me like i'm a fool,

You yell at me so viciously,

And in my mind I scream " Somebody Help Me!"

Don't do this to me,

You don't know my suffering.


-,Evan White


Friday, August 12, 2016

The Slaying of Princess Pain

Thoughts run through my mind,

I feel like I can fly,

The same way pain does ,

When it runs through my veins,

I wake up from this happy dream,

Where I can actually be me,

To find nothing but princess pain,

Who slays boys with self hate,

Tells them they are to be shamed,

I must do what needs be,

Put on my armor and hold my sword,

Go to war with the danged whore who slays,

Princess pain.

Her army of emotions must be destroyed ,

The battle wages on and there she is,

In her blood stained dress,

The sociopathic bitch.

She says to me " give up you worthless dick!" ,

I say back " I'm sick of your bitching and rule in my lfie.",
She offers a knife saying " die.",

I feel her power but do not stir,

Having enough I thrust my sword into her lung.

The deed is done,

The war is won.

Priciness pain is replaced by her sister,

Princes Joy,

Who with God's blessing rules the land with hope,

And peace and love.

Thursday, August 11, 2016

listen.....

Everything seemed so normal,

Like every other day,

He went to school and acted like he was ok,

What else  could he say?

So it all was hidden away,

Yet the crazy boy could not escape the pain.

Sticks and stones left cut arms,

And what they did left him enraged,

The wound that was in his heart worsened,

But  nobody knew,

As everything was bad it turned worse,

his best friend was found dead after a drunken wreck.

he stared at her body and felt her pain.

Still nobody knew.

It was too much, so he  looked at the schedule from trains.

11 P.m., he laid on the railroad ties and waited,

11:10 came and so did the train.

The Amtrack ran over him,

And his life was over,

He was happy with Jesus and his girl.



H.U.R.T.

Heartbroken

Unloved

Rejected

Trash.

That accronyn sums up me. I'm heartbroken, feel unloved and rejected and i'm trash. Sorry for the short post. Will try to do better.